Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Finding the Constant Among the Inconsistent

There are so many things in our life that are just plain unpredictable.  There just isn’t any certainty that things are going to happen the way we planned.  Between call-outs, trainings, late calls, extra jobs and so forth, our family has learned not to commit to anything wholeheartedly.  I say I can do that girls night next weekend because my husband will be home to take care of the boys but that is definitely not a concrete promise.  Well, when it comes to my marriage and its relation to the force there are certain consistencies that I can depend on; some are more welcome than others.  Here are a few examples.
  1. I can always expect numerous outbursts from the off-duty professional with his arm around me while watching that pre-recorded crime drama.  It may happen like this.  “That would never happen.” “What are you doing?!"  If a (bleepity-bleep) ever backlit me like that…” “Bring in that elbow you idiot!)  **Sigh**  One day he will remember they are just actors.  This is just a movie.  The bad guy got caught.  That’s all they want you to know.
  2. It did not take me long at all to figure out that when we were in public I always had a pre-determined seat.  That seat was any one that I wanted that was not the one facing the main point of entry in a facility.  It’s so instinctual for me now.  While we are led to our table I quickly scope my options considering which seat allows for the best view of the majority of the crowd while also having a non-obstructive view of the main entrance.  I DO NOT sit here.  It needs a cool name.  Maybe something like the BVP, Best Vantage Point.  I mean, what happens at a SWAT conference and they go out to dinner?  Do they flip for that seat or what?
  3. My officer finds comfort in offensive humor.  Please do not mistake his grim wittiness for insensitivity.  It’s simply a way to make light of a terrible situation.  This makes it interesting when he and my father, an Austin Firefighter, get together in public. I always feel the need to apologize before we even sit down or use their P.A. to give out some sort of disclosure.  I wouldn’t trade them for anything though.
  4. Inside jokes and code phrases, or “shift talk” as I like to call it.  Whether it be a coding system to rate the beauty of a woman or some made-up word to describe the crack-head they tackled during a foot pursuit, cops have their own language.
  5. The random doorbell question during dinner.  This happened more often when we just moved into the neighborhood but it still happens randomly. Neighbor:  Uh, hi, uh…My best friend’s mom’s ex-husband keeps calling her.  What can she do? Me: (in my head of course) Uh, well, uh…she can tell him to screw off.  But that’s why I don’t answer the door. 
  6. You will know his friends and co-workers by their last names long before you get to their first.
  7. The quiet that interrupts our lunch conversation is just another part of the gig.  My oldest still hasn’t caught on, but he will get there.  Dylan and Braydan will come to know that Daddy has a certain stare when something important comes over his radio.  It’s easier to notice, of course, when his earpiece is not in.
  8. The sound of Velcro is like Heaven on earth.  This means my husband is with me one more sweet day.
  9. Number nine is my favorite.  While out with my uniformed love, I will never take for granted the random handshake or “thank you”.  It will always be a proud moment to see my husband being honored by a citizen who is thankful for his service to the community.  I always feel privileged to be standing next to him when that happens and am always humbled when they turn to me and thank me for being supportive of his career.  

You see, when you are a LEO wife you will always be disappointed if you expect things to happen a certain way.  But there are a few things you can expect to be somewhat consistent and I hold on to those dearly.  

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